Creative Writing, Momentary, Poetry, The Fine Line

Behind Closed Eyes

tears on my pillow
pain in my heart
caused by you

Her words ring loud in my mind as I think about you. Emotions pour forth under my closed eyelids, soaking the pillow on which my weary head lies.

I’ve thought about us, almost daily, through and through. The notion of our unspoken love summoned to come alive but still, until this day, no words have been exchanged and thus my heart continues to cry.

I cannot laugh, I cannot eat, I cannot sleep. Yet I close my eyes. Only as a means to find your face again. But in all my trying I only find that I become Frankenstein! I create a face that is not yours. I create a face that belongs, a little, to all of my lovers; in whose arms I’ve lain to take away that pain that is your absence. I create a monster.

I close my eyes and share moments with you that you will not remember; to force back tears, yet still I cry, for my love will forever remain tender – for you alone, for you right now but you will never know.

I’ll let him go
This time
I will.
I’ll let him go
This time.

The song I sing each night as I make-believe I sleep. I let you go for  mere moments as I travel to the dimensions of dreams. Dreamland we called it. You remember?  The place, each night we’d meet.

While I’m there, sojourneying through this love, I see you clear; as bright as day, more beautiful than a thousand doves. A symbol of freedom, my dear. My one hope now, in all of life, is that of you I might dream and dream forever.

Oh my love, I wish you knew the light you bring to life. But you never will, for I won’t say until the day I die.

*

I’m asleep now and this way I’ll stay. In dreamland I have forever locked myself away.

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